Torment

I need to express it somewhere. i need to talk. but dont feel like talking to anyone. so let me write it down here please? thanks.

No mood. no mood. no mood. Today's Monday 20th Feb of 2017. currently in my celcom office. Spot:Meja hakim. hmm. He left. to chuping, perlis. So, this spot is mine. Fik used to sit next to me (i mean next to hakim's table haha) but he moved to menara celcom in KL too. So now, i'm all alone. How sad. kan? Hmm. So yea, i've been working in Celcom under SL1M program since last november. I was having so much fun here. seriously,no kidding. I have good friends around me, nice department to be with, kerja ada takda je, cuti banyak, non-stress environment, kakak-kakak office yang so sporting i tell ya. Until.....i'm the only one left here. Sorang sorang keluar. Mun, wana..lepas tu fatin, hakim, teha, fik... Macam sekaligus tu, one after another. Only then, I found out that I was'nt actually into this kind of job, it was just the environment that motivated me to wake up every morning and pergi office. Not anymore. Or maybe, I was harshly demotivated by the fact that this job is non-permanent and my beautiful-future is nowhere to be seen. 

I am currently in the agony (serious mental suffering) of not liking whatever I do in Celcom. The worst part is, even looking at jobstreet hurts. I don't wanna give up so easily, but looking at this phase, I feel like giving up. But, if giving up can actually sooth me down, I would have definitely done it. Thing is, giving up is not going to help at all. So, the only choice that I have right now is, to just ignore all these feelings, dan buat je kerja dekat Celcom tu, asal siap, boss tak marah. 

Oh crapp wait, I do have Allah. I do have faith. Ayuuuu! 

4:22 PM 20/02/2017

Crest Building, Petaling Jaya.